Tuesday, July 27, 2010

General Admission: Is the Pleasure Worth the Pain?

NoAngel writes:

A piece of unsolicited advice from a biased party: If you possibly can manage it, at least once in your life, get yourself as close to the stage as humanly possible at a General Admission concert. We've all heard the horror stories about the long lines and the aching feet and backs, and the fainting, drunken fans. And yeah, you might have to sleep out all night on a filthy sidewalk in your Hello Kitty sleeping bag, and wash up in the bathroom of a fast food joint, and suffer in brutal heat and humidity (unless it's San Francisco, in which case you risk frostbite in July). You’ll have to endure passers-by staring at you with pity and handing you a couple bucks, reassuring you that, “it’ll be okay honey, buy yourself a sandwich and try to stay clean and sober; I’m sure things’ll turn around for you soon…”

Once they open the doors, you’ll need to run like a maniac to find your place, leaving slower (so-called) fans in the dust. You’ll have to elbow your way into the best possible position, and stake your claim on the six square inches of space you'll get. Make friends with the people around you, because you’ll be close enough to share body fluids for the next several hours. And no, the person groping you is not interested in a more meaningful relationship, they’re there for Adam, too. Forget looking glam, because by the time Adam takes the stage, you’ll be a sweaty, dehydrated, disheveled mess.

But, here’s the thing! When Adam does take the stage, he’ll be so close it’ll take your breath away. You’ll be able to see every freckle, every speck of glitter, his every expression. Imagine what Adam sees when he looks down into the crowd at his feet—a sea of awed, joyous faces and flailing arms, and you’re one of them! If you’re a pretty boy, he’ll sing suggestive lyrics right to you. If you’re not, he’ll flirt with you anyway, cuz he's cool like that. From your vantage point, you’ll feel like you're at Adam Fucking Lambert’s private party, and it’s the best time you’ll ever have.

Trust me, friends, it’s worth it!


  1. After reading your post, I almost want to stand out in the million degree heat in Lubbock to get a spot right on the stage. It must have been sweet.

  2. I was lucky enough to stand pretty close to the stage at Highline Ballroom in NYC, site of the Kradam Rock My Town concert and the infamous audience glambulge groping and Adam's black lipstick. We stood for at least 10 hours in the frigid cold, no food or water (which is probably why so many fainted that night) and only one bathroom break. As I tell everybody, it was TOTALLY worth it ... but I'll never do it again! Still, everybody needs to try it at least once just to see this glittery alien up close, doing what he does so well.

  3. I've been there, I've done that (Nokia Theater)and totally agree with you. I'm doing it again in RI. I can't wait!

  4. I've done it three times now - once in London at Heaven and twice in the US. It IS painful and everything the writer describes but sooooo worth it. Nothing can compare. I am still having withdrawal symptoms.


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