Friday, June 25, 2010

ContraBand Capers - Part Deux!!

AnthrogeekPF, renowned manthropologist here. Look, NoAngelPF, speak for yerself with this "pre-Raphaelite poetry" nonsense, OK?? My concerns are much too worldly for such fluff. As a renowned manthropologist, I was busy in the lab late one night when my eyes beheld a skeery sight.... LP's wish list we knew we couldn't fulfill! (Look, I'd like to have been able to afford a new glam-spiked dog collar for Falco, too, but had to settle for a contra-band - good thing Falco's got a skinny neck!).

Anyway, so NoAngel scribbled up a letter, sent it to DallasGlitters, the keeper of the stash of contrabands, and Dallas spent an inordinate loving amount of time compiling them into little bundles with a lovely little tag with each band member's name, and of course, AFL gets the Big Boy!! We tweeted LP a couple of times after allowing several days for the Pony Express to arrive, and he occasionally replied that he hadn't visited his PO box lately, but that he was going "tomorrow". So, fast forward a few weeks thru LP's procrastination and.... well.... nuthin'. Did he get 'em?? Was he offended?? Did he get that it was a JOKE?? No clue!!

With the results of our contraband caper a complete mystery, fast forward again to Stir Cove on 6/10, where I combined a family trip with my first (and AFL's 4th) Glam Nation concert!! While milling about waiting for our hotel room to be ready, I saw LP wandering thru the lobby alone and vulnerable, so on the spur of the moment, I accosted greeted him, pulled out a little bundle of the 5 or 6 contrabands I had brought with me, and forced them on him pressed them gently into his clenched fist hand. I asked if he recalled receiving a box of them and he said he did, and that he had given them to everyone and they all loved them. He was so sweet and kept thanking me! No, thank YOU, LP, for being such a good sport!!!

He then disappeared into the bowels of the building, and it wasn't until a day or two later that I realized he'd been on his way to sound check once I saw THIS photo evidence that someone (source unknown) posted on the web!!

He had given them to AFL, who wore them during sound check!!!!!! Once the fine folks at Planet Fierce got their hooks into these pics, all sorts of theories began flying as to whether they were indeed PF bands and how they may have come into his possession (various PFers had passed some along to band members at previous casino concerts, including our dear friend Dallas), but the minute I saw that exact combination of purples with a lone silver, I KNEW those were the ones I had just given LP!! And so, my fellow PF peeps, this is the story behind the story.

Uhhh..... THE END?

Or is it......? Heh heh. Let's just say from now on, new contrabands have a certain "trademark" that identifies them as genuine certified official "contrabands" - accept no substitutions! You just never know where they might turn up next........... GLAMAZING RACE IS ALMOST HERE, BITCHES!!!


  1. hahahaha - that is fucking awesome.

  2. Wow, way to grab the bull by the horns Anthrogeek! Fierce is the new Bloomsbury! Next ones will glitter. Who wouldn't want 6 Fierce glam rubber glitter bangles?

  3. This story kills me. I had witnessed it peripherally, but didn't know the whole scoop until just now. Great job with the "gift cards," Dallas!!

  4. Splendidly told. And way to seize the moment!

  5. love the whole story guys!

  6. Yay that's brilliant! Nice one!

    Now do you think I could get decent stuff if I beg for random shit over the internet as well?

  7. Well…never one to let a good contrascam opportunity go to waste, my fellow pranksters and I could not pass up the chance to grant LP his wish and shower him with a valuable (ok, not so valuable) treasure trove of silicone for him and the rest of the adored glam band! It has now become our obsession, I mean passion to (accost)(stalk) show them our love if we happen to, say, end up in the same elevator (where they are cornered) and gift these glorious ADAM FUCKING LAMBERT rubber bands to them when they least expect it! Anthrogeek, always quick on her clubbed feet, managed to corner LP at Stir Cove and, by gawd, the next thing we know, the HBIC is fucking wearing the Rocker Chic Variety of Colors ContraBand Set she so cleverly (cobbled together) designed and just happened to be carrying around in her (camo rucksack) purse.

    As my clever friend with the questionable green hair and pointy ears once said “I think you two are just one ContraBand encounter away from a restraining order!” To that I say nonsense! Onward my Three Glamigos! I’m counting on you girls to carry out our Secret ContraBand-Agent Mission (S.C.A.M.) with as much dignity as one can muster while following a convoy of AFL buses through the vast desert highways of Sunny California!

    I’ll be closely following your glamazing journey as you carry out your S.C.A.M. to see that the band and AFL get the much sought after Limited Summer Edition of ©ContraBands!!!!!!

    OK! Get it on Glamigos! I’ll be sittin’ back in my easy chair enjoying the adventures while carefully familiarizing myself with the California Penal Code…

  8. Wait, wut? OMG That's Adam...wearing Dallas' Original (TM) Planet Fierce Contrabands!




  9. Having encountered the Glamingos in San Francisco and watched Anthrogeek in action; I have to say I suspect that shifty character has ulterior motive. She is on a "tag and release" program of PFers. Go to their habitat or watering hole, identify them, ingratiate them; then put the rubber bands on their wrists the way a zoologist doing field work would with rare birds. Let them go back to where they come from with a unmistakable identification marker on their body....
    We should think twice before we trust an anthrogeek! But the rubber bands are so mag......


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